Earthbender Wisdom

The past several years have been an interesting journey. Mini-me has gone from a non-verbal, head-banging, screaming, frustrated toddler to a child that presently is mainstreamed in first grade with an aide and assistive technology to support him, and the capability to converse at length on all things Thomas the Train, Transformers or, lately, the movie "The Last Airbender". Recently, I was treated to a wonderful glimpse of my son's perspective as we sleepily conversed early one morning before the rest of the household was awake.

Mini-me: "I'm a six year old boy, I have three sisters, and I am autistic."
Me: "Yes, you are, but what does being autistic mean?"
Mini-me: (after a thoughtful pause) "It means I have to learn to be a good Earthbender."

Reflecting on his comment later, I realized just how accurate he was. In the cartoon series The Last Avatar, certain people are born with the gift of manipulating one of the four elements - water, fire, air, or earth. They are able to manipulate their gifted element in a manner to build or to protect those around them - to be an asset to their community that acts for the greater good. At the same time, for those who cannot accept the responsibility that comes with the gifts, they learn to injure and maim and to destroy until, ultimately, they themselves are destroyed. Learning to master the art of element-bending is a long, arduous process, not without some pain, learning to cope with the separateness the gift brings and a great deal of frustration and repeated practice until, finally, acceptance of all their gift brings, the responsibility they bear and who they have become in the process.

The journey my son takes parallels those few so gifted. He must learn to deal with the world around him step-by-step, something most of us take for granted and do simply by osmosis, and in doing so develops a unique view that brings those around him a new perspective. By careful observation, frustration, and continual practice, Mini-me learns step-by-step to manipulate what he is taught into something that he can use to function within the world in which he lives. In the process, he himself must learn to bend, to accept, to join, and to find his place among the people of his community even while remaining somewhat separated, using the gifts he has been given - his intelligence, his sense of humor, his imagination, his perspective of the world around him, and an incredible continual curiousity for details often overlooked by others to become the extraordinary adult I know he will be.

In the process, he will take risks I can not protect him from, and more than I would ever have wanted him to experience. But then again, even now he already seems to be aware of that himself and takes those risks in stride. Watching my young son fearlessly climbing trees recently, I grew anxious at the "bridges" of old boards he had created across the various limbs of the trees. As he stepped out on one, it tilted up and fell out of the tree, just as he grabbed for the tree limb.

Me: "Wouldn't you like something a bit more stable up there? We can get some nails to hold them in place, Mr. B."
Mini-me: "Yeah, I know...but that's okay. Wibbly-wobbly is much more fun."

You're right on both counts, Mini-me... With that strength of spirit, you will indeed be a wonderful Earthbender...and yes, wibbly-wobbly is much more fun.